We live in a world of more than 7 billion people.
This makes it very easy to fall into a give group or just get lost in the crowd.
Every one has their own set of skills and with the power of the internet is pretty easy to stand out.
But what about standing out in the real world?
I feel like people forgot how to stand out outside of the web, which can contribute to the lack of success in the workplace or social life.
Why I feel that way?
Because I was lacking the skill of standing out.
To be more specific it’s not a skill, all you need is knowledge. you have to know how to stand out, you have to understand how peoples brains work.
That’s why I decided to start with:
1. Start reading books
Only about 30% of people continue reading books after they finish their formal education. Which makes the other 70% easy target for educated people.
With the majority of people being uneducated about how their thought process proceeds it’s pretty easy to stand out.
However you should concentrate on psychology books.
Good reads are:
- “The Social Animal” by Elliot Aronson
- “The Power of Habit” by Charles Duhigg
- “Obedience to Authority” by Stanley Milgram
- “Mindfulness” by Ellen Langer
“How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie
2. Engage with people
Now that we’ve covered the topic of knowledge let’s use it! Start engaging with people. Start working on defeating the introvert in you!
There really isn’t a cure for introverts. What I’ve found work the best is practice! Just go and start engaging with colleagues, your boss, your teacher. Start discussing different topics, ideas or even a problem that you’ve encountered (just make sure you don’t sound annoying with your talking)!
Just think how many of your colleagues go and start a talk with your boss!
Remember that they also are people and you should not fear the opportunity of making yourself know, especially if you work for a big corporation.
3. Good manners are key
Ok, you start to talk with let’s say your boss (it might be a woman you like).
It doesn’t matter!
The point is that after some time (keep in mind that this might not happen) you might get asked on a lunch (If it’s your boss! If a woman asks you out, then you really need to start learning more about the behavior of women!) and when you are one on one, is the place you are ment to shine!
Show your manners! Open the door, offer to pay the check (if the other person insist, let him to, this way he will feel superiour.)
So the third thing is keep your manners at their best. Also words like thank you, you’re welcome etc., will get you places you never imagined!
4. Keep your word
I bet your granddad told you that a man always keeps his word. Well in todays world the majority of people somehow forgot that rule.
We’ve talked about engaging with people and how manners matter, and after you start to know people some of them will start trusting you! This means they will give you work and tasks to do (just make sure you don’t turn into a personal assistant). Doing the job on time and the right way is what you should strive for!
5. Be initiative
As the saying goes:
Mister “not my job” never drove a Lambo
Ok, let’s get away from the work sphere and go into friendship.
Just imagine offering to do something for a friend, how much this can improve your relationship with him!
In other words: Always do more than what you are expected! This is a highly regarded feature!
6. Speak your mind
I see so many people that never succeed just because they are too afraid to say what they think. Remember that a person who is too afraid to raise his voice will never get noticed!
Simple as that:
- If you disagree – speak what you think!
- If you feel like you have to interfere then do so!
- Never let someone else make decisions that you are affected of!
- Say what others are afraid to say!
7. Actions speak more than words
Simply put – never brag!
We all have that one friend who always brags what he has done. The thing is that after the fifth time he bragged it became funny to listen!
Do what you have to do and leave your actions speak of you! Only if you get asked speak about it. Even then don’t get lost into how great you are.
You can find a lot more on the Internet. This list here is my personal that have helped me stand out, and for they work.
Try different things. Experiment!
Gentleman, that’s it for today!
See you on the next one…
– E. A.